I Wanna Date You, But...
I just can't make this shit up. LOL. Who knew that when I started blogging, it would prove hazardous to my love life? Well apparently it is! To fully understand my story, I kinda have to give you a little background. Now understand that my reason for making this entry this isn't for spite. I'll always respect a person's privacy and anonymity. If you notice I usually make up names for my dates for two reasons: 1) because a bad date is a bad date, and I seriously bear no ill will to any of these dudes, and 2) because I don't wanna get sued. LOL. The whole point of my blog in the first place was to bring more feeling and personality to my writing, which my writing instructor felt that I lacked. I don't like to have my business on front street, but since I've had this blog, my writing really has improved, so apparently I really do need to open up a little more...anyway, without further divagation, here it is:
I've recently been swapping emails with a fellow who read my blog and is "intrigued" by me. We'll call him The Email Courter. He initially sent me the following email:
I've been reading your blog for a while now, and I find you very intriguing. I love your humor and the fact that you don't take yourself too seriously, and even though you've been on many baddates, you never seem to to turn into one of those angry black women waiting to exhale. I would love to get to know you better, maybe over dinner?Me:
Thank you, I'm flattered both by your offer and that you take some time out of your day to read my blog. Forgive my cynicism, but how do I know this isn't a joke?He responds giving me a barrage of personal information about himself, including where he worked and his home and work phone numbers. I Googled him (found nothing), found his listing in the phone book, then gave him a call at work after hours (cause that's how you really know if a dude's telling the truth about his identity). All that checked out, so we spoke a few times on the phone.
He and his coworkers are going out for drinks on Thursday. He invites me along. I don't commit, but indicate that it might be a possibility. Then I get another email this morning:
Subject: About Our DateMe:
I enjoyed our conversation yesterday. You're exactly as I imagined you would be from your writing. I hope you will consider joining us on Thursday, but I must be honest about one thing: the invitation was a conditional one. Promise me that you won't talk about it on your blog.
LOL. I enjoyed our conversation as well. Thankfully, you don't seem like a crazy serial killer or anything...but then again you could have read my recent entry about being crazy, and adjusted your behavior accordingly. LOL. Anyway, about the blog...I dunno if I can promise that I won't discuss it. I mean, I won't use your name or anything, but I might discuss it. Depends on whether you give me anything to discuss. LOL.The Email Courter:
:) Trust me, I'm not crazy. But I'm also not comfortable with the possibility that you might discuss our date.Me:
I really don't see the big deal, considering that's how you "met" me in the first place. So I guess I won't see you on Thursday then.No response. LOL. Where do I begin? *sigh* This is funny to me on several levels. Maybe it's that don't-take-myself-too-seriously humor that The Email Courter admires. Or maybe it's the fact that I thought people actually got a sense of who I am from my blog entries, only to realize that dude spectacularly missed the point. Or maybe it's because I spent an hour yesterday talking to a dude that I have a huuuuuuuuge crush on, and I haven't been able to stop smiling ever since. I dunno.
I guess some people think I passed up a good opportunity with a nice guy all for a stupid blog. But [Friday, the movie] there are principalities involved [/Friday, the movie]! This is who I am. This is what attracted you to me in the first place, and yet you're telling me that in order for you to act upon your attraction, I have to promise not to do the thing that attracted you to me to begin with? Sounds confusing? Yeah, you bet it is! We aren't even dating yet, and dude wants to regulate my actions?! See what I mean about crazy not happening overnight?
Don't get me wrong, if dude had a valid reason for not wanting me to discuss him anonymously on my blog - such as his parents were killed by a blog, or something like that - I'd respect it. If we were dating - heck, if we'd even gone on one date - I'd respect his wishes...to a point. But I think his request is just plain ol' unreasonable.
Thank you, Email Courter, for the offer; but I will not sell my blog for a date. No deal! And by the way, I'm blogging this shit. LOL.
Comment on this (you too, Email Courter!) OR
Email me your own dating/relationship question (you too, Email Courter!)
posted by SimplEnigma @ 9:27 AM
14 comments
14 Comments:
Foolish. I think it had everything to do with respecting someones wishes. If somebody tells you something and says "keep it between us," do you tell everyone in earshot? It was a simple request. Most likely he is a private person and all you had to do was see how the date(s) went first and then, if it didn't work out, post the saga.
hahahahaha
Mr. A, I agree it IS foolish to respect someone's wishes that you don't know. I respect the wishes of others as long as it doesn't compromise my agenda
If someone I KNOW tells me something and says keep it between us, I keep it between us. If someone WHO IS A STRANGER emails MY BLOG and says keep it between us, it's fair game.
If he (or you) had read my blog, you'd notice that none of the stories (ironically except this one, because I was so incensed) I relate about my personal life are things that are going on NOW...it's usually after it's happened and some time has passed. Ahh, the lightbulb just went on, I see. Chances are, this would be no different.
As I said, if this was about being spiteful, I have all his personal information. If he's such a private person, why's he giving out his information to a stranger? For all he knows I could be a big fat dude named Killer writing this blog.
If dude would've waited until after, shit, DURING the first date to ask me not to write it on my blog, I would've considered it, because then I know him and it's personal. But to tell me my invite is conditional, WTF is that?
Dude, I don't know you, and I have no incentive to "respect your wishes"
i think the person is mr. a himself
LMAO LMAO
HA HA... I'm Cheesin
the comedy of errors called me... NEVER dat. I got more game than that... fa sho.
But, I see simplenigma's point. See sometimes its good to know the rest of the story. I had the impression you spoke and went beyond the net. I had the impression she was feeling him and wanted to see where it would go. Guess I was wrong because she says he is a stranger.
That aside, I see simplenigma is one that will not accept any opinion but her own and those that reinforce her own. ;-)
LOL @ COE...somehow I think Mr. Opinionated, er, I mean Mr. A would have a little more spine than that. He'd have probably responded to my email - something The Email Courter has yet to do. LOL. Must be the Season of Shadiness...hehe
@Mr. A...it's unfortunate that's how you perceive me, but (although it's wrong) you are entitled to your opinion. LOL. Seriously, I'm not like that at all. When I'm wrong, I can admit it. But when I feel strongly about something, and no one has a convincing argument to the contrary, then I will not be swayed on my opinion.
I spoke to the dude on the phone, why didn't he say something then? Why is it ok for me to have to wait until after the date to decide how to act, but you're not demanding the same behavior of him? Why couldn't he wait until after the date and "see how it went" before making such an irrational request? The unmitigated gall of him to assume he was blogworthy!! The nerve! LOL.
ROFL RIF (that's for mr. a)
I gotta agree with COE, I think mr. a is your man LOL
Anyhow...I agree with you SE; how's the man gonna say based on your blog entries, he finds you intriguing; would like to meet you, but then CONDITIONS it by asking you NOT to write about it?!
[confused]HUH![/confused]
He said, "You're exactly as I imagined you would be from your writing"
If that's the case, what harm could there be in seeing a humourous commentary on what could have been a great (or not so great)date?
I can say that, although we've been regaled by SE's stories, we really have no clue who she's speaking of.
Oh well, SE...crazy is as crazy does, right? No harm no foul
LMAO @ "The unmitigated gall of him to assume he was blogworthy!!"
Hmmm guess he was. LOL
Search... Reading is fundamental fits in where?
For all you fools thinking he is I and I am him. This guy fits not my profile. I don't have time to try to catch women off the net... on purpose. If so be it, then so be it. But, I'm not going to try and create something with someone I can't see.
The funniest part about all this is the response from the person I said it about was better than that of you two. YOu would think I said something about you two.
Now, now Mr. A...no need to get miffed. The one rule we have around here is that you can't take things too seriously. Search and COE are just bustin' your chops. Take it easy...no need to call anyone names. LOL. And don't knock internet dating - I just finished filling out an eHarmony application. LOL.
Well good luck. I know someone who has been with the person for over a year off of eHarmony. As long as people tell the truth you should be okay.
Hehe...I'll have an entry on the eHarmony saga in a little bit. LMAO.
Honestly, if you have a bad eHarmony story I would have to offer you do some introspection on your part (barring someone who just lied on their information.) This person I know had bad experiences up until they used eHarmony. Its not perfect, but looks very promising and has been going for quite some time. As a matter of fact, they are almost nauseating with their cuddliness.
The man is tripping and I agree with you.
I read this already but read it again and couldn't stop laughing over this
"...if dude had a valid reason for not wanting me to discuss him anonymously on my blog - such as his parents were killed by a blog, or something like that - I'd respect it."
Hehe.
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