Facebook Taught Me Everything I Know About Relationships

So it's over. I must admit, I had a good run. Aside from my quasi-relationship with First Love, I think I've set a new record for myself. I am actually quite proud.

It wasn't the compatibility issue. Like Owen said, "if you put two people in a room and they don't kill each other, they're compatible." Besides, sometimes I can be a little anal...I need a little Type B every now and then.

It wasn't that he'd go for days without calling me. I'm not really a phone person either, although it would have been nice to get a call every other day saying, "I'm thinking about you."

It wasn't the fact that he was a smoker. Even though for the first few months we dated, I never tasted or smelled smoke on his breath, then one day it appeared and never left.

It wasn't the lateness. I learned to be more flexible and compromise.

It wasn't the fact that he gave me the wrong name - and didn't clue me in until I found out in a store. It's exciting to sleep with a stranger every once in a while...besides, it's my fault for not looking at his driver's license.

Noooo, I promised myself I'd stick it out. Y'see, men are always complaining that women cannot appreciate a nice guy; and despite all these little, er, indiscretions he was a nice guy. He treated me well. So I didn't do the typical "SE thing" and bail the first time he annoyed me (thanks mostly to Ness and my Cousin the Fatist who instilled in me the value of patience and forbearance).

But the straw that broke the camel's back was logging on to Facebook and seeing the following (on the same day he'd managed to change his profile picture, I might add):
Relationship Status: Single
Looking For: Friendship, Dating, A Relationship, Networking...

Wait, what???!! I read it again...and again...and again. Unfortunately, it didn't change. Dude was looking for everything except his house keys on Facebook. Since I was raised by a male and have 5 brothers, I knew that there was a strong possibility that it was just one of the retarded things guys sometimes do. I got some male feedback from a friend's boyfriend who agreed that it was one of the retarded things that guys do. My Cuz the Fatist agreed.

But I couldn't get over it....I think that was just the tipping point. I think deep down I knew that we couldn't make it long-term. And even though one friend suggested I "hang on 'til my birthday to get my gift" (yeah, not all my friends are as reasonable and level headed as I am), I knew it was time to end it. So it's over. But he's such a nice guy that we've remained friends - while I help to fluff him for his next relationship. And they said it wouldn't last...LOL.

Even more ironic: I think we're even closer now than when we were dating. LMAO. What can I say?

Some people make better friends than lovers...